Happy Holidays!!!

I'm hoping that you all had a wonderful weekend and hopefully with the snow that's falling outside, some of you are able to extend your holidays a bit longer.  We here at Camp Hartshorne are very excited about another day of nothingness.  The holiday itself was wonderful, and continuing on.  So far Mr. S's Christmas has lasted three whole days.  We are on day three of gift opening and there are still three more presents to go.  He has bursts of present opening where one or two are broken into, he'll discover the toy inside and play for the majority of the day with that item.  It's been the most perfect Christmas.  I'm not assuming others will be like this,  once he understands that each package could potentially hold the "hit of the day"  but we're enjoying it while we can.  If it takes all week to get through the last three I'll be perfectly content.  It's very fun to listen to a 17 month old say "oh, wow" as he rips small bits of paper ever so slowly away from the box.  Even when he can't see the contents  "oh wow" is repeated three or four times over.

Sometimes things just happen because.....

So today was jamned packed full off activities before it even started, but we forgot to tell Mr. S. and he had his own schedule.
It's been a learning curve, this motherhood stint.  Unfortunately, the curve affects two other individuals in this household,  not just the mother-in-training.  This weeks learning curve - drum roll please- ear infections.  Its a long, not overly interesting story, but after a week of fluctuating behavior, he was taken to the doctor and well, now we know why we haven't been sleeping for the last three nights.

So needless to say,  his schedule out weighed all others today.  The dinner with great friends we haven't seen in a year was cancelled, the trip to run extra errands is on hold, the house is a shambles, and the second Christmas tree of the day is in the living room, a quarter of the way decorated.  It's turning into one of those holiday stories for the books, long story short, lack of sleep leads to difficult days.  I've just finished letting the movie Motherhood play through while I tried to accomplish something on the list from today.  There is a long story with this movie around cost and profits, not to be gotten into here.  I really liked it, as a new mom.  I wouldn't have otherwise.  The point of referencing this movie is truly just to point out that even though the weekend might end up less then anticipated, I'm decorating the Christmas tree by myself again, and I'm so tired that typing real words is taking every bit of my being, it's all fine in truth.  There will be more moments like this as the years go by, but they will be outweighed by other, seemingly insignificant at that time, but filled with so much excitement and happiness we'll all just burst.  Like Mr. S does every time that vacuum cleaner starts up!

Completed gift!!!

Here they are,  my first pair of men's socks.  They are completed in time for Christmas, or rather before Christmas, which is a minor miracle in this house lately.  It takes a long time to knit man socks,  I think I'm going back to baby socks after this.  Mr. Romance did the modeling,  nice legs huh?

Ring those bells it's holiday time!!!

In an attempt to be politically correct and sensitive to everyone's religion, we changed the words to all the Christmas songs at school a few years ago to "holiday" instead of Christmas.  That was fun enough, but you really had to smile when instead of singing about Santa, you sang about the "jolly old man".  I've had a good time singing them tonight,  poor Mr. S.  He is stuck with me :)  But I think he might like me!

Happy Fanksgibin'

What are you thankful for today?  Family? Turkey?  Pie? Sweet Potatoes?  Margarine?  Don't ask.  It's going to be a running holiday joke, starring Grammie and Grampy.  We're going to get some mileage out of it too.  Have a wonderful holiday and find the fun in it, don't let the craziness get to you!

Trick or treat!!

Mommy picked the clothes,  Mr. S picked the helmet.  He might be small but he sure has opinions about things, and today it was wearing the helmet, inside for a long time.  The saddest part of the whole thing is that not five minutes after the helmet came off, he walked into a wall so hard that he fell down, poor man.

It's October 27th and 70 degrees???

So let's all go for a bike ride,  shall we?
Yes I know,  my child needs some MORE colors in his outfit.  What can I say, he dresses like his mother.

autumn leaves are falling, autumn leaves are falling

all are around.  Now I have that preschool circle song stuck in my head.  It's a funny world we live in.  For years I have sung silly songs, from girl scouts, to camp to work and now to daily life.  It's amazing how many times you can sing the same song over and over again.  I might start a count for my own insanity - how many times will I sing the clean up song this week?  Or maybe not, now that I think about it.  But hey, at this point,  if singing works,  I'll just keep on singing!
We've been fighting virus after virus in the house lately, but that doesn't mean we're not cute!!

UUUURRRRGGGGGGGGHHHHHH!

I'd like to introduce you to something beautiful.  It's soft, smells nice,  squishy, and so so very warm.  The colors are fabulous and it has just the right amount of drape.  It's swings ever so gently as I walk.  Here she is.

I love her.  This is the second attempt at a sweater out of this yarn.  I love the yarn, it's is very light and easy to work with.  The sweater pattern itself is very popular right now, and since I had so much of this yarn I decided to try my hand at sleeve and added two more buttons.  It would be the most wonderful sweater in the world, if.......................................

I were a 44 inch chest.  I'm not.  There is nothing wrong with being a 44 inch chest.  I wish that I was to tell you the honest truth, because then I would have this wonderful sweater to wear whenever I wanted to.  I tried to make it work, I wore it for a whole day, I loved it.  But it's just to big, and when asked directly what he thought,  Mr. Romance told me that it looked like I could keep another person under there with me.  I just don't need that in a sweater right now. 

I tried to be good with this.  I couldn't follow the pattern as it's written so I took my gauge, my measurements and the EPS with regards to how many stitches to use for the sleeves (which fit perfectly by the way, I do love them).  But somewhere in all the distractions and lack of "thought out"ness.  I have a huge sweater.  

Bottomline:  I ripped it right back out again.  I want this sweater made from this yarn and I'm on a budget.  So, I'm going to try again, and this time I'm casting on about 20 less stitches then before.  So at least it should go faster!!!

Oh and I left the picture big,  it's how I feel about the whole thing right now and wanted to give you some perspective.

It's happening again, I think.

Mr. S is only 14 months old, and it looks like we're looking for yet another daycare setting.  I've vented about this plenty, but it lurks in the back of my mind all day long.  It's similar to dating,  you have to call, set up a mutually convenient time to met,  make pleasantries and small talk, than either hope that they love you and want you (or rather your child), or you have to break up with them.  It's freaking exhausting.  Never mind the fact that it has to be fit in after a full day of work/play, when the small boy is so tired he's ready to fight anyone who comes near him, which as can be imagined makes a fantastic first impression.

It's little (or rather huge, depending on how much sleep I'm gotten) things like this that I never could have imagined prior to having a child.  These are conversations I might have listened in on and nodded my head and felt minor sympathy with before.  Now I'm consumed with it.   Oh, I do know that there are people with real problems and this is small in comparison, but it's getting to me.  The problem with situations like this is that you can't just jump up and fix it, it takes times.  Plus what if I make another bad decision?  I didn't know the last situations would turn out like they have.  Maybe I should throw all of my reasons for choosing where he's at now out the window and try to find a new criteria.  Man, I'd love to out source this to India right now.

Oh and I did find the perfect place,  it's also $105.00 more than we pay now.  Let see, great daycare but live on ramen noodles for life?  I know money's not suppose to be the final say, but that is a lot of money per week, never mind per month.  It's actually two thousand less dollars than my entire undergraduate college tuition.  Oh did you know that I went to grad school?  :)

If I have to go to work,

then the preschool's a pretty good place to have to go.  That's how I'll sum up my first week back at school after a fantastic summer vacation.  Since I have to go somewhere,  I might as well go there.  It might sound like a put down, but I can't think of a higher compliment for a job really.  If I can't be on vacation, then I'll go there.

Someone else is enjoying his "school" too.  So much so that he's needed continual bathing when he gets home.  I'm fine with that, I'll take a happy filthy baby boy over a clean sad one any day.

I'm in love!!

I have no idea who actually reads this besides Mr. Romance.  Sometimes people will comment to me in person about reading it, and other times my wonderful knitting sisters will post a comment.  All are appreciated, though I really just use it for myself.  Its a great place to just be proud of a project or capture Puddin for a brief second and be able to look back on the moment since they go by so quickly.  But right now I feel close to bursting so I'm going to let it spill here.  I've had a wonderful summer and here are some reasons why:

I have found time to knit again, it's feels like coming home to a house with bread baking.  Even before you eat it you feel warm and satisfied!

Grampie and Grammie have been able to spend a good portion of time with us, which is great seeing as they live 5 hours away, and someone really likes his Grampie!

Honestly we had a very low key birthday celebration (hence the Thanksgiving bib) but we had to have a hat picture!  

I was able to have an excuse to go to playgrounds on my days off.

Hiking with my favorite boys.

He doesn't nap, but he sure is cute!

I can't believe that in eleven days it's over again for another year.  I live a charmed life indeed, if for no other reason than how happy it can be with the little things.  Now I'm off to go squeeze some beautiful red/pink merino cashmere sitting on the coffee table!  I'm thinking lace ribbon scarf by Veronick Avery.  

Camping........

On a resent trip to Acadia National Park last weekend, our first introduction to family camping was a bit of a change for me.  I think Mr. Romance would be happy to report back that he enjoyed the more lax, less militant camping style, from my previous conservationist, NO impact expectations of years past.  Let's face it, when you travel with disposable diapers and a huge red wagon, you let the backpacker in you relax a bit and actually use the dumpster at the campground.  I think J might have filed for divorce if I'd insisted on packing out the dirty diapers......I might have divorced myself for that matter.

Someone found out about headlamps!!  That was just too much fun.

It's a tough call on who's more excited to go back, mommy, daddy or Puddin'.

The wagon was better entertainment then expected.

Obsessions

As a person with an addictive personality,  any chemical more potent than tequila or those silly cigarettes was not an option during my college years.  Knowing that fact about myself might have saved my life, or just made things harder for myself,  I probably should have shied away from the tequila.  That would have made things simpler as well.
So now here I am in my late 30's.  That's the first time I've written that down.  Yikes!  37 is closer to 40 than 30 isn't it?  Oh well, for anyone who is about to comment on that,  the 30's have been so much better than the 20's, so I'm almost excited for the 40's.  Plus I'm already grey so who cares.  Anyway, off the tangent,  I'm in my...(we just covered that, move on) and the addictions have just changed that's all,  it's yarn, and my it's all consuming.  Here I sit with 20 minutes to myself and I just want to go through my stash.  The house is literally falling into itself it's so cluttered and dirty, but it's the bins of yarn I want, the pattern potentials, the possibilities.  There are empty needles that need to be filled.  I will never get a FO out of any of the things cast on at the current moment, so who cares.  Let's just keep at it.  It's the potential that is exciting!

Happy Birthday Big Baby!!!

It's Big Pud's birthday.  He's a year old, a whole year old.  Man, the things he has learned in only one year. To bad there isn't a way to bottle that and and keep that going for years.  I knew that he'd be fun, but I had no idea that it would be this much fun.  Honestly if I'd known, I might have done this a bit early.  That being said, it's a good thing I waited because I was able to get a lot of things done and it's been a year since I had decent sleep!

I don't remember a lot of last summer but I'm pretty excited for the rest of them!

Summer vacation..............

As a child, summer vacation meant the lake.  That was pretty much it.  Before moving to Maine,  our family vacations were at the lake, then when we actually lived there, as soon as school was out we'd move to the camp and live there until school went back in.  In college though, life kicked in.  There were summer jobs away,  friends to visit, other parts of the country to see, tourist towns to live and work in.  I can say that I've had the opportunity to live in some of the most beautiful places in Maine and New Hampshire, and because of this over the past 15 years I've spent very little time at the lake.  Funny how as you get older you begin to appreciate quiet and solitude.  I feel like I've had the first REAL summer vacation in years thanks to the lake.  And as you can tell from the picture,  everybody relaxes at camp :)

In knitting related news,  summer vacation has meant some quality knitting time.  I'll post pictures when I small man isn't crying.

Full on mommy mode............

So another school year has passed, and a very eventful one at that.  It started out slowly, thank goodness.  But by the time February rolled around, it was full swing preschool craziness.  Some people ARE what they do.  We all know of, it not know,  someone who is.  These people remain excited, committed, almost single minded, with their job also being their hobby.  At times I wish I was more like that, I always think of extra things I'd like to do for work, but then the reality of life (aka laundry and dishes) or even my desire to sit down to knit and watch a favorite show (Glee, this week).  But I do truly love my job, I'm very fortunate and wouldn't want it any other way.  Don't get me wrong, there are days when I don't want to be there as much I should, but when you get to think about your day in terms like "play" "circle" "snack" "outside", it's fairly easy to get over yourself and enjoy the day.

But here I am on summer vacation, and I love it!  It is also only two weeks long before I go back to work part time, which makes it all the sweeter.  As the week has evolved I've had to remind myself to let some things go,  it began with this feeling that since I was home I should be accomplishing things.  I was soon to learn that my opinion of what was suppose to be accomplished in the course of a day is not what my son thinks should be accomplished.  In three days he has had a total of 90 minutes of napping at home, seems he doesn't nap so well for mommy.  He's learned to crawl at a runny pace, and to pull himself up to everything.  His dancing skills have improved daily as well!  He can do more than just wiggle his diaper,  he's got arm movements involved now too.  I've never worked so hard and had such fun in my life, but man,  I could use a nap!

Happy Mother's Day

It's very strange to think about where I was a year ago - for one thing I was getting a LOT more sleep, (I am actually smiling as I type that) and I had a concept in my head about what was going to happen and what life would be like.  That being said,  I had no freaking idea!

I love this little man, and I have never worked harder in my life, been more tired, had a more demanding boss or ridden a bigger emotional roller coaster.   He makes the toughest job I've even done seem like a cake walk.  Everyone told me these things, but prior to him, all I've had to compare IS the hardest, toughest thing I've ever done.  And true to form, I've never loved anyone so unconditionally or had such a bright spot in my day as this little guy.  If someone can wake you up three times between two am and six am,  and you are still happy to see them, it's got to be love, don't you think?  Thank you Daddy and Puddin'.  You are tons of fun and I love you both very much.

Knitting again!

I have two finished projects,  one finished long ago, well three months ago.  But truly wouldn't you rather I wear my new socks than just photograph them and blog about the experience.  I mean even I love a good handknit sock, but I don't want to read about them that often, how can you?

I also have finished a personal triumph.  It has taken me about a year and a half, with many different mistakes and ripping it out at least three times, but I am happy to say that I have a vest as part of my wardrobe that I was able to actually wear before it was too hot outside (it actually WAS to hot outside, but I refused to admit it, twice).  Whew that was a long run on sentence.   It doesn't look that spectacular here, but I do like it - though it doesn't look that spectacular on either.  The post-pregnant body doesn't thrill me with it but the yarn is pretty.  And I started running so hopefully things will begin to fit better.

What a beautiful day!

Yes, it's a very simple title, but you can't sum up this weekend any better way.  March,  it's such a strange month - I struggle with it every year.  It signifies the end of a fun winter and winter activities, but the beginning of warm weather and even more fun.  I will say that this year I am completely fine with the end of winter - probably because my participation in winter activities was sub-par.  I did not get the kites out off the shelf, the telemark skis have not seen their friends, the telemark ski-boots and the poor snowboard only had two conversations with the snowboard boots this winter.  So considering the Clarkshornes of winters past we have done NOTHING.  That being said,  there was little snow, lots of rain and it was very mild temperature wise, plus I haven't gotten the best sleep this winter.  All extra energy has gone into being able to stand up straight some days.

That being said, I'm not in a hurry for winter to be over,  I'd take another snowstorm so we could use the sled again or be locked in for a snow day, but not too many.  I'm working at just being present for today,  and tomorrow I'll enjoy then.  On one level the days go by so slowly- like on Monday thinking about when Friday will come, but  then on weekends the days fly and I could begin to panic about how quickly they ended.  I need to stop and breathe and take them as they come.  So "what a beautiful day" we have here.  I think I'll go get the crazy baby out of bed and take him out to see the world!

It was bound to happen eventually............

My father has recently shared a story with me about being a new parent.  He recalled driving home from work some thirty plus (many pluses, but that's not the point of this story now is it?) years ago and thinking to himself, "Things are going really well right now, but that could change any minute, I'm not going to get to caught up in it."  I have no idea if things went bad soon after or if his tide of good fortune continued however;  I now have a definite appreciation for his statement.  Let me preface this story with the acknowledgement that given the state of the world, and the horrible conditions of Haiti,  I know this is not anything to be truly concerned about.

But given the small bubble of my world,  I was feeling pretty good, everyone seemed happy and content.  Baby Puddin' was thriving.  Then my daycare provider dropped the bomb that she wasn't going to continue her business............ ughhhhhh!  She has said that she will keep him until June because she committed to me in the fall.  But he's home with just her, without other kids which, if I can't be home with him I would like him to socialize.  So the search has begun, and it is agonizing.  At least once a week,  Puddin and I trek off after work to meet another person who does daycare, we are there for about an hour and then drive away wondering how it's possible we wasted another hour of our lives that we can't get back.  They are nice, just have different principles than we have.  One didn't think through her advertisement to babysit, and realized AFTER we talked that she wouldn't be able to do it.  Come on - really?  You just figured that out now?  Not when you put the Ad in craiglist?  There is one person left to meet, and of course I'm certain she is the ONE for us.  I get as hopeful about meeting these people as I did with internet dating when I meet Mr. Romance.  I just hope it ends as successfully.